An open letter
To those of you
Commonly known as tailgaters
January 30, 2007
Tailgaters,
This letter is to you people. You people who always seem to need to get somewhere faster than the rest of the world. You are like haunting shadow, and entity, that stalks me days on end with no remorse. Your ugly scowl mirrors my hate and annoyance for you. I see you from behind and would love no more than for you to fall from the nearest skyscraper around you. The world would most likely thrive and perhaps achieve its utmost goal also shared by the views of many beauty pageant contestants of attaining world peace if you were to just never again be allowed to share the many roads and highways. You are tailgaters.
What right do you have to drive so closely to me even as I am already pushing the speed limit by about five or so over? You people certainly must not be aware the dangers involved in your driving conduct as you increase your probability of an accident tenfold. Better yet, myself or any other pissed off victim of your tailgating could at any time slam on our nice anti-lock brakes causing a nice accident in your fault. The least you could do is grow some balls and pass these slow drivers you ever so commonly come across. Even if you do manage to pass, what happens next? Time after time you will just sit at that red light I come upon a couple of seconds after you do or end up behind the next driver of insufficient speed for your needs not even 100 yards down the road.
I consider myself a new driver as I have only been on the open road for a little over a year and a half now. Despite this, I am taken aback by what extreme dislike I have already built up for you and your fellow devils of the driving world. You are like that one mosquito on a hot summer day that manages to find its way into my ear again and again with that unbearable buzzing sound of yours. You are like the smell of an old math teacher’s breath at 8 a.m. as he lingers over you checking your homework. If you tailgaters were a taste, you would be something along the lines of a vomit-flavored Popsicle. I would rather go outside right now and roll around in the snow for twenty minutes and then proceed to jump into a hot-tub to feel that infamous pins-and-needles sensation than to be harassed by your obnoxious driving. And finally, I would walk in on my parents before having to see your good-for-nothing figure in my rear view mirror again.
Sincerely,
Mike Rivamonte
To those of you
Commonly known as tailgaters
January 30, 2007
Tailgaters,
This letter is to you people. You people who always seem to need to get somewhere faster than the rest of the world. You are like haunting shadow, and entity, that stalks me days on end with no remorse. Your ugly scowl mirrors my hate and annoyance for you. I see you from behind and would love no more than for you to fall from the nearest skyscraper around you. The world would most likely thrive and perhaps achieve its utmost goal also shared by the views of many beauty pageant contestants of attaining world peace if you were to just never again be allowed to share the many roads and highways. You are tailgaters.
What right do you have to drive so closely to me even as I am already pushing the speed limit by about five or so over? You people certainly must not be aware the dangers involved in your driving conduct as you increase your probability of an accident tenfold. Better yet, myself or any other pissed off victim of your tailgating could at any time slam on our nice anti-lock brakes causing a nice accident in your fault. The least you could do is grow some balls and pass these slow drivers you ever so commonly come across. Even if you do manage to pass, what happens next? Time after time you will just sit at that red light I come upon a couple of seconds after you do or end up behind the next driver of insufficient speed for your needs not even 100 yards down the road.
I consider myself a new driver as I have only been on the open road for a little over a year and a half now. Despite this, I am taken aback by what extreme dislike I have already built up for you and your fellow devils of the driving world. You are like that one mosquito on a hot summer day that manages to find its way into my ear again and again with that unbearable buzzing sound of yours. You are like the smell of an old math teacher’s breath at 8 a.m. as he lingers over you checking your homework. If you tailgaters were a taste, you would be something along the lines of a vomit-flavored Popsicle. I would rather go outside right now and roll around in the snow for twenty minutes and then proceed to jump into a hot-tub to feel that infamous pins-and-needles sensation than to be harassed by your obnoxious driving. And finally, I would walk in on my parents before having to see your good-for-nothing figure in my rear view mirror again.
Sincerely,
Mike Rivamonte
1 comment:
I would walk in on my parents before having to see your good-for-nothing figure in my rear view mirror again.....
(eww) never knew you liked that kinda stuff i guess what ever floats your boat. haha
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